Don't follow the shadows

I know I’ve hardly updated LiveJournal in the past few months. I’ve just haven’t really wanted to make my presence known. I feel like being a recluse, actually making some art outside of assignments for a change, and emerging once I’m feeling more confident. Perhaps I just need to start drawing and writing more and through catharsis, I'll feel a bit more open again. I promised myself I'm going to do some drawings in an old sketchbook I made with various background treatments back in high school. That might help. More importantly, I need to get back to drawing in general, since I haven't created anything other than digital work this semester.

I think it goes without saying that I didn’t go to the Pagan Knights Tour over Spring Break. He never got back to me, and it came and went. It’s a shame he puts me behind his ridiculous number of friends when I’m the only other heathen he knows that also listens to the same music as he does and knows just as much about Asatru and Tolkien. However, I think that’s where the problem lies: he’s one of these guys who likes to be the know-it-all, and I’m a major threat to this. He’s too immature and can’t handle someone who may be above his level of knowledge on his favorite subjects. Just like all the others, he’ll probably eventually realize he made a big mistake, but I decided I’m not going to try to salvage any shards of a friendship that may remain. I also refuse to be his rebound once he breaks up with the nasty illegal immigrant, which I’m almost expecting to happen after the guys I’ve known to be just like him have done the same thing. Now he has the Gods to reckon with, since he really proved to be much of an honorable heathen. Pushing me aside, not getting back to me, and refusing hospitality aren’t exactly good for one’s reputation, nor follow the teachings of Havamal. For that, I am also sorry. Thankfully I’m not too concerned about going to Paganfest now, after Eluveitie dropped out.

On the bright side, my dad decided he doesn't really want to move back in, so at least that's not an issue at the moment. However, I'm annoyed that he planned a trip down to Texas over Spring Break and didn't invite us. To make it worse, SXSW was going on at the time, and I obviously would have loved to go.

Well, I’ve just finished buying ten textbooks for this semester. I don’t mind reading, but come on. This is a little ridiculous. A hiatus may be in order, depending on how things go. My classes have been off to a good start, although I'm a little disappointed with the content of my anthropology class, and one in particular is worth mentioning at this point.

In Norse Mythology we watched the newer Beowulf movie with Angelina Jolie. Let me tell you, there’s a reason it’s in the $2.99 bin at Blockbuster. It’s the worst film I’ve ever seen. The only thing good about it is the special effects and cinematography. There were some unintentionally funny moments like when Beowulf ripped his way out of a sea monster via its eye and yelled “Beeeeeoooowuuuuuuulf!” Other than that, it was so cheesy and far from historically accurate. The visual representation of Grendel and his mother (played by Jolie who can’t act to save herself) was so farfetched it was a joke. It makes me sick that Hollywood wasted so much money on that bullshit. I can’t believe the professor chose this one over Beowulf & Grendel, which only came out a year prior. The two only thing that bothered me about that one were the actress who plays Selma wasn’t that great, and most of the characters had Scottish accents while they were playing Danes and Swedes (with the exception of the Irish monk). Otherwise, it’s a pretty good film with some actual humor, a well-developed and focused plot, showed the true nobility of the heathens, and yeah…Gerard Butler as Beowulf. 'Nuff said.

( Which reminds me, there’s this Swedish guy in my Norse Mythology class, and you can probably guess where this is headed… )

That 26-year-old illustrator guy who found me on MySpace is now stalking me. All we did was exchange some messages back and forth, and he thinks it's something serious. After I started getting some weird vibes from him and found out that we don't have as much in common as I thought, I told him I am very busy now (which I am) and that I would let him know if and when I'm available. The funny thing is that I never mentioned or hinted that I was interested in dating him. He simply asked if I'd like to go out for coffee sometime. Anyway, after a week went by, he sent me a message nagging me, and asking what he did wrong. I have a lot of work to do right now, and the last thing I need is some needy guy adding to the stress, so I blocked him. I hoped he would just think I deleted MySpace, or at least leave me alone if he figured out I blocked him. But no, he goes and creates a new account just to harass me with. He sent me a message mocking various things I'm interested in that he's not, saying how we have so much in common when we have completely different tastes and priorities, and asking what my problem is. I think the best thing to do now is just ignore everything he sends me and not block the new accounts he creates.

It may seem pointless that I'm letting this get to me, but it spills over into "real life", since he attends Friday Night Figure Drawing pretty much every week. Next semester, I will be required to attend, and I've already seen him there before he even started messaging me, so I'm a bit concerned. Not only does it go for three hours, but it ends at 10:00 PM, and I'll be walking through deserted dark plazas and woods at night to get back to the dorms, and this guy definitely seems like the type who would actually go after me. (This guy I went to school with years ago stalked and sexually harassed me, so I think I can trust my instincts when it comes to this one. I just hope I don't have to get administration and police involved this time.) MIAD's figure drawing sessions are on Tuesday evenings, so hopefully my schedule next semester will permit me to attend, even if I have to take the bus and spend more money.

I also forgot to mention that this guy who found me on MySpace a day before the Children of Bodom show approached me as I was leaving the venue. The only reason he left me alone was because Robbie was there, and I know this because he said so later. At least now that I've blocked him, he has left me alone, knock on wood.

Honestly, I get tons of creepers trying to get with me on Facebook and MySpace, but these are the first times they've been this persistent and are people I've seen and probably will unfortunately see again in person. I refuse to let them win by deleting my pages. Plus, the networking has been useful and more good than harm has come out of having them.

I also got charged $30 by US Cellular for browsing ringtones on my phone using EasyEdge, and I didn't even pick one! The application said it was free to sample for a day, which I did. I don't think it's fair to charge for that when I didn't even do anything. My sister did pick a ringtone for her phone, so maybe that's what the service charge was actually for.